What do you call a professor without pupils?

♚ OOC
Name: Moo
Age: 30
Contact: bacsojin
Character In-game: N/A

♛ IC
Name: Waver Velvet, Lord El-Melloi II, Professor Charisma, Master V, Big Ben ★ London Star, Waver MacKenzie. I'm not making these up, I'm embarrassed by how stupid they are
Canon: Fate/ franchise
Canon Point: end El-Melloi II Case Files volume I
Age: 24, both physically and mentally. Sometimes acts like a bratty 5 year old.
Gender: Male
Species: Human. Magi are genetically slightly different from normal humans in his canon, but in this setting and with his status as a very weak magus I doubt it matters beyond going "oh and he has a higher body temperature than normal."
Appearance: Bam ma'am

History/Background: Linking the wiki for completion's sake, but I will be writing his history out. The wiki is notoriously low-quality and his page states information that was retconned, applies to AUs only, or are based on Gray's assumptions as if they are all fact.

Waver was not born to an established family of magi. In fact, strictly speaking, Waver was not born into a family of magi at all; his maternal grandmother was never officially taught to master her craft, instead learning the secrets of the trade through pillow talk with the powerful magi she took to her bed. Her daughter practised magecraft even less, and it was not expected that Waver himself would take any interest in it.

But he did. A boy of middling natural talent but blessed with a genius level intellect, Waver became enchanted with magecraft and wanted to learn more. Sadly, he lost his parents tragically to illness, and it is implied his relationship with his grandmother had long gone sour. Waver sold what possessions his family had left to pay his tuition for Clocktower, the school of witchcraft and wizardry the Magus Association and the centre of the Association's Western presence. An optimistic boy, Waver felt that although he did not have the pedigree, his professors and peers would see that he was a hard worker and a diligent student and would be accepting of him for his efforts.

He could not possibly have been more mistaken. Imagine Harry Potter going to school where Draco Malfoys are the average, the hate for muggles is strong, and Voldemort's ethics are the norm. That's what Clocktower was like for Waver Velvet, there was probably even some magic people only sport that he was complete garbage at. His peers bullied and harassed him, and the staff not only encouraged it, they helped. He was mistreated by everyone, not taken seriously, and barred from such basic privileges as using the school library. Even though his scores were so impressive that he was a good candidate for valedictorian and he had much higher work ethic than other students, Waver found that he was morally incompatible with the society as a whole, and his attempts to challenge centuries-old traditions were met with scorn and ridicule.

So he did the stupidest possible thing. He stole an ancient relic from the professor who hated him most and ran away halfway across the world to take the man's place in a tournament to the death fought using the ghosts of famous jerks as weapons. Waver used his modest magecraft skills to trick an old couple into believing he was their grandson visiting during a break from schooling and used Lord El-Melloi's relic to summon his Servant in the Holy Grail War, Rider. What he got was Alexander the Great, and what Waver thought of him was rather the opposite of "great" or even anything "good." Like everyone else in Waver's life, Rider did not attempt to understand him and made light of his wishes, and for the first half of the war the two did not get along all that well. Rider rarely listened to the young magus, and Waver was swept up by Rider's whims in both a figurative and literal sense.

But there were a series of incidents that changed their view of each other and their relationship. First, when Caster's murdering of children becomes a problem that must be immediately dealt with, Waver impresses Rider by using simple alchemy to find the Servant where others could not. Waver thinks little of himself for using such a basic method, but Rider tells him that using something simple and clever is far more worthy of praise than using something flashy and needlessly complicated. A deeper understanding begins to form again when they reach the lair and, against Rider's warning, Waver sees what has been done to the children inside. The boy's breakdown over it stirs sympathy and a sense of protectiveness in Rider, and he begins to pay closer attention to the boy's frame of mind.

Later, Rider steals a barrel of wine for a King's Banquet that he sets up between himself, Archer, and Saber, and it is at this dialogue between kings that Waver begins to understand Rider's own mindset and wishes a bit more. Not that he likes them any better, of course. This is also the first time Waver himself finds out about Ionian Hetairoi and comes to understand a little of what camaraderie means. This, coupled with dreaming about Rider's life, is what finally turns Waver's attitude around enough to finally let the man have some fun in town and want to learn more about who his own Servant was as a person. They have a heart to heart about Waver's insecurities and why they do not see eye to eye, but it is interrupted by Caster turning into a giant tentacle monster. Master and Servant both have an important role to play in the battle that follows, and Waver in particular is forced to rethink his previous point of view.

Rethinking his point of view leads to rethinking his place in the War, and on the last night of the battle Waver uses all of his Command Seals frivolously and frees Rider, bowing out because he feels he isn't good enough. But Rider insists that they fight together because they are friends, unwittingly (or perhaps knowingly) finally giving the boy the one thing he'd been looking for all along. They ride to battle together, and in their final moments as a team, Rider asks Waver to be his vassal. Waver tearfully agrees before watching Rider charge on Archer and perish, just in time to have his own real fight of a sort as a man; facing down Gilgamesh himself. He had promised Rider that he would live, and makes it clear to the enemy Servant that he will try to keep this promise no matter what he himself wishes. His loyalty impresses Gilgamesh, making Waver one of the few humans to ever earn the King of Heroes' respect, and Waver has the distinction of being the only Master to walk away from the Fourth Holy Grail War relatively unscathed.

With the war over, Waver returns to his grandparents, who are now aware that he is not truly their grandchild, but who nonetheless have a fondness for him that he returns in his own way. He makes the decision that he needs more world experience, and chooses to stay with them for a time while he earns money to travel abroad and see the world. Eventually, he returns to London and, feeling guilty over the death of Kayneth Archibald El-Melloi, helps the family rebuild by gathering most of the man's scattered notes into a single volume of information. This action was more important than it sounds, because magi families are used to all of their mysteries simply being passed down the lineage through their Magic Crests, and thus have never had a need for keeping organized paperwork or tomes as family heirlooms. Waver performed a task that was tedious, time consuming, and took skills he had but that were not prized by magus society. Because of his efforts, the house of El-Melloi was able to keep itself from falling apart, and a proper heir was found in the Archisorte family. All of Waver's work meant that she did not need to rely on Kayneth's ruined Crest to inherit his knowledge.

As "repayment" Waver was given the title of El-Melloi II, though this gift was really more of a double-edged blade; in granting him the title, Reines made it perfectly clear to him that he would serve her for the rest of his life. Waver was given a teaching position in Clocktower, where he proved to be a surprisingly excellent instructor; most, if not all, of his students have never achieved less than the highest two ranks. Because of his exceptional talents as a professor, Waver was elevated to the Fourth rank himself and made head of the Mineralogy Department. However, this did not suit his particular talents in the best way, and the Modern Magecraft Theory Department was later established with him as its official head. However, even in this Waver was well aware that he had no real control and was being used as a means to a political end - but being a man of no political ambition, he took the job because he does not care.

Five years after his experiences in the Fourth Holy Grail War find Waver having finally taken his own apprentice, a girl by the name of Gray who he had met six months prior. When he is not teaching in Clocktower and avoiding the political scheming that takes place there, he is being sent on various errands by the mistress who has no trouble reminding him that she owns him, Reines. In this way, Waver has become a sort of Sherlock Holmes of the magus community - and there's an irony in that, given his love of mystery novels - who is sent to solve mysterious happenings for the El-Melloi house on the sly. In this case, Reines promises him a spot in the Fifth War, knowing it to be his only true ambition, if he can investigate the inheritance and mysterious circumstances surrounding the death of an old magus who had an obsession with angels. Waver takes his apprentice along and travels to the old man's castle, finding himself to be one of a handful of guests who were invited. Like all good murder mysteries, he and his companions must solve the plot and get to the truth as they are killed off, one by one.

I'll omit the details on the off-chance any mods want to read the book, as it's no fun to read a mystery novel knowing all of the details beforehand, but naturally Waver eventually finds the truth while accidentally placing himself on the radar of someone who's attention he'd rather not have in the process. Having done what Reines asked of him, he and Gray go home so that he can prepare for the Fifth Holy Grail War - which he of course does not get to participate in, in the end.

Personality:

To understand who Waver is, one must first understand who Waver was. As a boy he was extremely bright and entirely too curious for his own good. His early life was spent in an environment that encouraged these traits, but also gave him a very strong moral compass. Although he understands that there are shades of grey, Waver knows there's a sharp line between right and wrong. Although his fascination with magecraft was not exactly embraced well by his mother, he nonetheless had the early support necessary to grow into a young man of genius-level intelligence, charm, and good manners.

Waver never got to become that young man. He was orphaned young, and used going to Clocktower as a bandaid for the loss of his parents. But when he got there, he was not given the validation and support he expected; instead, he was harassed and isolated by student and adult alike. The constant bullying and loneliness destroyed Waver's self-worth entirely, and instead he became a young man of genius-level intelligence, bitterness, and more trust issues than one could pack into a clown car. When Fate/Zero begins, Waver often blames how others treat him on jealousy for his talent and intellect in some sort of mockery of the arrogance he's surrounded with. But it becomes apparent over the course of the story that this insufferable ego is a front, a way he behaves to make himself feel better about the fact that no matter what he does, the world he wants so desperately to be part of refuses to accept him.

The blunt truth is that Waver doesn't understand what being a magus really means. His views are well-meaning, but entirely naive. He has determination in spades, he's clever almost to a fault, and he's intelligent enough to be one of Clocktower's best students academically despite how absolutely ordinary he is as a magus. He isn't terrible at magecraft - in fact, he excels in schools that rely more on calculation and logic over raw talent, such as alchemy - but he isn't good, and in order for his peers to overlook his poor lineage, he needs to be great. It never truly dawns on him that magi treat one another with just as much contempt as they show for him. The only difference is, he's common, comparable to garbage dragged in from the street, and it is socially acceptable to treat him as exactly that openly. The rules of politeness that govern magus society and dictate when to smile and when to stab one's back to not apply to him.

It isn't until the Fourth Holy Grail War that Waver begins to understand that magi are not human, that they cast away human morality for what they consider a higher purpose. He comes to realize very quickly that Kayneth is going to torture and kill him at the slightest opportunity, and he sees first-hand what magi are capable of and how little they regard human life when he discovers Caster's mutilated children. The fact that eliminating Caster became a priority because his actions were drawing public attention and not because of the deplorable behaviour itself was not lost on Waver, either. He had spent much of the early half of the war angry, wanting to be taken seriously, and also terrified, but it wasn't until the unfortunate events with Caster that Waver truly understood what he was getting into and began to realize this was maybe not what he wanted to be after all. He was forced to take a good, hard look at himself, and part of that meant staring his own lack of self-esteem right in the face. All Waver had been seeking all along was someone to accept him for himself, and realizing this, he deemed himself unworthy of being Rider's master and removed himself from the War. It was then that Rider actually gave him what he'd been seeking, and that friendship became the very core of all the changes Waver made as a person.

...Which were not very many, as it turns out. As an adult, Waver behaves in much the same way he had five years ago. He's still a skittish, disagreeable man with a too many trust issues to fit inside of a clown car. He has, however, come to understand the world around him much better than he used to. Like some bad joke, Waver gains a reputation and position of respect within Clocktower and the Association long after he has abandoned any desire for it. He has a keen understanding that those who extend their hands to him with offers of help and alliances are using him as a means to their ends, and he ignores all of it with blatant disinterest. He is a man of absolutely no ambitions, who serves his mistress loyally because loyalty has always been one of his core traits and she usually treats him well. His one goal in life is to fight alongside Rider again, to show him how much he has grown, to try and become his equal, and once again this fervent wish is born from loyalty. Rider is Waver's only friend, and in a way, that has put him on an out-of-reach pedestal.

Of course, he is also a pessimist, and part of him suspects this will never actually happen. Instead of always trying to prove he deserves a place in the world, Waver simply expects it to screw him over, and in a lot of ways he simply takes the easy way. He keeps to himself, not becoming overly familiar with his students despite the fact that he could completely change Clocktower if he rallied them under him. He simply doesn't want to. He's more concerned with hiding in his tiny apartment and playing video games. He likes peace and quiet and not being bothered.

And yet, none of these traits entirely define him; he is not a shut-in made of flaws. The clumsy boy with good manners never disappeared, he's just gotten a bit calmer and a lot less invested. Waver still flusters easily, especially around women he finds attractive, as he himself has admitted. He's polite almost to a fault, even addressing his own apprentice as though she ranks higher on the social ladder than he does, when this is not the case. In fact, he goes so far as to write thorough reviews of the games he plays, with critiques as well as what he found enjoyable, simply because he feels he owes the game developers thoughtful feedback. He whines like the brat he never stopped being when Reines teases him a little too much, and he plays the part of a petulant child when Gray assumes the role of responsible parent - again, despite being his apprentice.

At the same time, Waver is a man of remarkable patience, especially with children, who he seems to have an easier time connecting with than adults. He's stubborn beyond what's healthy, and for all his huffing and lackadaisical attitude, he never half-asses anything. That strong sense of morality has never left him, either; Waver knows that ethics don't serve a magus, and instructs his students to realize this fact, and yet he admits that he cannot let go of his own. Gray relates this part of his nature by telling a story about a time when a cat he did not like ruined his boot. Ever the immature one, Waver spent a great deal of time thinking on how to harmlessly prank the animal in revenge. And yet, when he found the cat dying, he comforted the animal and held it in his arms until the end, then gave it a burial and was distraught over it in his own way. Gray points out the significance of his actions by mentioning that Waver is usually extremely meticulous about his appearance, sparking his anger at the cat in the first place, and yet dirtying his clothes didn't matter when it came to the animal's suffering. She further gives insight into Waver's mentality by addressing his anger at himself over his inability to heal the cat in the first place. Waver understands better than most what magi are capable of, what they do, and yet he himself never hesitates to do what he knows is the right thing. He whines and complains, but doesn't hesitate when it comes time to prove that he cares. He is a tsundere through and through.

Of course, the cleverness, genius, and curiosity that put him on Clocktower's doorstep in the first place have not diminished either. Much of Waver's more temperamental behaviour is typical of highly intelligent individuals that lack enough mental stimulation, and he's no exception. Simply put, he's crankiest when he's bored. If intellect were ranked instead of talent, Waver would be at the top of the food chain. He excels at solving mysteries and puzzles, at strategy and logic, and in matters of observation and perception. His expertise in these areas are so great that Reines trusts him with tasks she would not give to other magi, and he manages to pinpoint the strengths of every student in his class and focus his learning plan to the point that they become masters of their talents. It helps that his memory for detail is also excellent; Waver can remember the entire contents of a book after having only read it once. At one point he makes the waspish remark that he would rather take a red pen and correct a prestigious author's grammar than read their work twice. He has no trouble remembering minor details other people easily miss, and he often recognizes the significance of the most random details.

Basically, he's tsundere wizard Sherlock Holmes with a video game addiction. Is it any wonder the entire female student body wants to sleep with him?

Carrier: His carrier will be a chicken because I'm a horrible human being.

Magic Weapon: Professor Charisma's Scathing Mark
A fountain pen (red ink, naturally) that doubles as a poisoned dart when activated. Having good aim is not necessary, nor is the need to physically go and retrieve it; the dart moves through the air according to Waver's will - or more accurately, his narration. He must speak aloud what the dart is doing as if reading from a story in order for the weapon to work properly. If he is too slow to voice his intent or otherwise buggers it up by tripping over his own tongue, losing his train of thought, etc, the dart will either fall to the ground uselessly or end up embedded in something (or someone) else by accident. Focus is very much key.

The severity of the poisoning depends upon two factors; the amount of Waver's mana going into the assault, and his mastery of the weapon. At first being jabbed with it results in little more than feeling ill for a few hours. Probably a good thing, that, considering how shaky his control of it is likely to be. At the height of its potential, the dart will be capable of inflicting a poison that can kill smaller creatures and seriously weaken bigger ones, both within one hour of being pricked. This will take a large amount of mana to pull off and even with full mastery he'll be lucky if he can pull it off twice in a single day without a mana recharge of some sort. He will of course still be able to administer weaker poisoning at this stage by simply giving the weapon less mana.

Sample: This thread takes place in the game setting. Feel free to read the rest of the post if you like, but it's all terrible happenings from terrible people.